oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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