Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
