all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
