We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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