why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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