doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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