i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It's shark week go big or go home
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
