After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
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