True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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