Do vagina's smell?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
We just shotgunned beers for America
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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