I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
