Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
even my farts smell like vagina
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Randomize
