Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
