I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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