The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
