I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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