i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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