His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
