Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
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That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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