I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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