Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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