she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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