are you so shy because you have an std?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
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