haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
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