I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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