Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
