i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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