The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize