Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
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I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
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That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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