found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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