I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
