I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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