I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
