do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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