There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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