Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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