It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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