If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
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