If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize