brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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