I like to think it a success when the cops are called
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i love accidental penises.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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