Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I just had sex on a roof
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
