Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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