Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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