Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
