Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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