After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
