Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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