Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Randomize
