So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
