butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
